Day 27: GUARD

Wow!

I’ll say it backwards: !woW

I am blown away by the comments to yesterday’s blog! I came so, so, so close to not sharing my Anxiety Girl stuff.

I was afraid it would be the last straw, proving that I’m too much of a mess to be worth reading or hearing or “hanging out with” online.

Turns out, there’s a busload of us looking longingly at the “promised land” of contentment. We’re willing to move forward. But our internal GPSs are stuck on “recalculating route.”

Normal girls (or even “normal people”) just don’t get that you can’t twinkle your nose and leave where you’re at and join them!

I want to be calm and peaceful, there is a tangle in my wiring and I don’t know how to get to contentment. I need the roadmap and a hand to hold along the way doesn’t hurt either 🙂

I’m Just Saying…

I finally understand why none of the ideas on yesterday’s “Just…” list have ever helped me move from Anxiety to Contentment.

As soon as someone says, “Just…” I know that they have never walked through my particular fire. If they had, they would know better than to use the phrase “Just…”!

And if they haven’t, their advice is likely to be well-intentioned but impractical. They can’t do just-ice to my situation.

What I need is someone who says, “I know exactly how you feel. When I was where you’re at right now, I felt the same way. And looking back, the steps that helped me make progress are…”

Oh, then I am all ears!

100 Thankfuls

“My very first thought and comment (out loud) was, ‘Oh my goodness… I don’t think I could even get to 10, let alone 100.’ My Husband responded with, ‘It’s all about perspective. Not to mention, you need to change your bracelet because that was a negative comment.’ Urgh.”

“This year I chose the word grateful as my one word to focus on for the year. I’m choosing to find things to be grateful every day even if it’s raining all day. I’m trying to let go and let God.” 

If you’ve ever tried to brainstorm a list of 100 before, you know that you may (or may not!) get off to a fast start. But somewhere around 20 or 30, things slow down.

Around 60 or 70, surprises start showing up. By 80 and 90, new ground is being broken.

It’s so worth the effort and the time to get to 100 (and beyond!)

In Every Situation

“I do think praying and focusing on the good things helps but you have to do this constantly throughout the day and that is quite difficult!” 

Preach on, sister!

Perhaps this is why we are urged to “pray without ceasing.”

Reading this verse in context, we see familiar themes come together in a familiar list:

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

Anxiety: Such a Shame

I’m doing some research on shame, a root of anxiety. One researcher personifies shame this way:

“Shame hates it when we reach out and tell our story. It hates having words wrapped round it–it can’t survive being shared. Shame loves secrecy. The most dangerous thing to do after a shaming experience is hide or buy our story. When we bury our story, the shame metastasizes.”

Brene Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

Brown goes on to say that the best thing to do when shame hits “feels totally counter-intuitive: Practice courage and reach out! We have to own our story and share it with someone who has earned the right to hear it, someone whom we can count on to respond with compassion.”

She lists and discusses the kinds of people with whom I should not tell my stories. With pretty much every person in my life disqualified from helping me out of my shame, I was discouraged.

Reaching (for) Peace

(Can’t see the image? Click here to download Philippians 4:7!)

Then I remembered an epiphany I’d had about complaining: When it comes to people, I have to be very careful about talking only to the right person, at the right time, in the right manner in order to avoid complaining.

But when it comes to God, I don’t have to worry about such boundaries. He’s always the “right person”! Right now is always the right time for Him. And it’s not called complaining when I’m talking to God–it’s called prayer!

The same thing is true for shame. When I feel shame coming on, the only One who is always safe to share with is God.

God will not

• absorb my shame (to the point I have to make Him feel better)

• pity me

• fall apart with disappointment

• scold or blame

• insist I’m exaggerating (“It can’t have been that bad” when it really was!)

• one-up me

Guard My Heart

Far too often, I leave my heart unguarded.

Anxiety Girl dons her cape. She throws herself into throngs of people, heart bared to receive their approval or rejection, basing her worth on other’s reactions.

I used to get an adrenalin kick out of her routine.

But now, the peace of God sounds like the greatest thrill imaginable!

Yes, it’s difficult to pray and give thanks and surrender…every moment of every day.

But it’s 100x harder to live as Anxiety Girl!

In yesterday’s blog post, I pointed out that anxiety and gratitude can not co-exist.

Mindy elaborated:

“When I am anxious I am focusing on me. When I’m thankful, I am focusing on Jesus. When I’m focusing on Jesus, my anxiety disappears. How cool is that?”

Directions that truly transcend all human understanding:

{Gratitude —>  [Peace = Guarded (heart + mind)]} Christ Jesus.

The map for our bus ride from Anxiety to Contentment.

I’m on board!

How about you?

 

Try this today

Watch for situations in which you feel the urge to guard your heart with “baditude”:

1. Pray
2. Give Thanks
3. Surrender the urge
4. Experience His Peace

 

Leave a comment!

• responding to today’s blog, and/or

• sharing your Day #1-27 experience of replacing “baditude” with God’s word and gratitude, and/or

• about anything else on your heart!

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