If Marriage Was More Like Playing a Video Game…
If marriage was like playing a video game…
…my husband would face one specific problem which required his expertise to solve. (No video game requires men to “just listen without trying to fix anything”!)
…my husband would see clear goals which, with effort, he could attain. (No video game expects men to “just know without being told”!)
…my husband would receive copious ongoing feedback regarding his progress. (No video game gives a man the silent treatment for months and then explodes out of the blue!)
…my husband would be part of a mentoring community, giving and receiving tips and hints, such as special “hack” codes. (No video game expects a man to figure everything out all out on his own!)
…my husband would find the cost of failure low and the rewards of exploration high. (No video game nags a man until he feels like he’ll never get it right.)
If marriage produced the same “hits” of dopamine as playing a video game, my husband could consistently feel like a success, a winner, a champion! (Click to tweet this.)
So…how could marriage become even a bit more like playing a video game?
(For more thoughts on marriage, check out Chrysalis: A weblog for thinking Christian Moms.)
Cheri, this is fantastic… really a good post. I love the way you understand your man, his needs, and how he feels rewarded. What a great metaphor–video games.
All couples go through a steep learning curve (we sure did!) to learn how best to relate to one another. Our gender differences can be profound.
On the other hand, our gender differences can be our greatest source of joy and security. For instance, I’ve learned how to harness that mysterious male energy for my personal benefit… and now we’re both much happier. I get to have my feminine needs met, and he gets to feel successful in pleasing me. What’s not to like?
So glad to know you’re over that gender hump that can make marriage miserable. BRAVO!
Thanks for linking up. I’m thinking about offering an informal Marriage Linky every two weeks. Please come back!
(((Hugs))) e-Mom
e-Mom…
Thank you for your kind feedback! I just attended a Learning and the Brain Conference last week. One of my big take-away “ah-HA”s was the list of reasons video games are so effective at capturing the attention of gamers. My challenge in the classroom is to incorporate more of the qualities of video games into my curriculum planning and daily classroom experiences!
When I saw your invitation to link to a marriage blog post, I didn’t think I had anything to write about…and then I wondered, “If the key qualities of video games can apply to the classroom, why not marriage?”
So, it was fun to explore this new — for me at least! — metaphor.
I love the idea of an informal Marriage Linky!