Day 8: VICTORIOUS (+ Reason Why #5)
Why We G.R.I.P.E.
Continuing our exploration of the 5 goals of complaining+ (via the acronym G.R.I.P.E):
E = Excuse Poor Performance
Complaining is a natural language for coming up with excuses.
Have you ever asked someone, “How are you?” and immediately regretted it because they went on and on about what a bad night they had, how they got no sleep, how terrible they feel, etc., etc., etc.?
They basically served you notice: “I’m not planning to be pleasant or productive today; expect nothing from me!”
Some days, my students come to class sounding like they’re mad at me: complaining about me, criticizing my teaching style, and talking about how much they hate the class.
And for so many years, I took it personally, wondering what on earth I’d done wrong!
Then I started paying attention to what days they walked in complaining about me. Any guesses what is happening in class on those days? A test or a major assignment is due!
Their complaints aren’t about me as a person but about the fact that their lack of preparation is about to be exposed. Thus, the mad scramble for excuses!
Complaining is a classic Phlegmatic “Get Out of Today FREE!” card.
Battlefield Life
Do you ever feel as though your life is just one battle after another?
You feel this way way for a reason:
It is.
Our lives are battlefields.
After all, we live in the midst of a war.
I.D. the Enemy
I’m no expert on battle plans or strategies of war. But one thing seems obvious:
It’s mission critical that I correctly identify the enemy.
I’ve got to know exactly who are the “good guys” and who are the “bad guys.”
Or I could make some deadly mistakes.
Making Enemies
Like many teenagers, I thought my parents were “the enemy” for all the things I wanted to do but they wouldn’t let me do.
Then I got married at 21, and quickly labeled my exact-opposite-PURSE-onality husband, Daniel, as “the enemy,” fighting him at every turn.
Once I started teaching, parents who called me at dinnertime and were still chewing me out at bedtime became “the enemy.”
Students who defied me were “the enemy.” So were students who talked too much. Talked too little. Forgot their homework. Didn’t work during class time.
Of course, I’m my own worst “enemy” when I have a cart full of groceries but no wallet, stub my toe for the tenth time, can’t get my hair to do anything, put another dent in the bumper, and forget an important birthday (all on the same day!)
Even inanimate objects turn into “the enemy” when the printer jams, my GPS updates too slowly, and the toaster oven dies after just three weeks.
Public Enemy #1
When I quit demonizing others long enough to take a step back, I remember, “Oh, yeah! We’re all on the same side, here!”
We all have the same enemy. He’s goes by many disguises and names. One of his favorites is The Accuser.
- “You are such a terrible daughter for the things you said to your parents and for your disobedient spirit.”
- “You are the worst thing that could ever have happened to your husband. You bring him dishonor.”
- “You are a complete fraud of a teacher. Your students hate you and talk behind your back. None of them learn anything.”
- “You are completely pathetic. You can’t do anything right. Everything you attempt is ruined because you are defective.”
Silencing the Enemy
On our own, we have no hope against The Accuser. He can take our strengths and smash them into shards of shame.
Remember how Jesus responded to the enemy: Did he look around for someone else to blame?
No.
He went straight to the Word of God: “It is written…”
Our Don’t-Keep-Him-a-Secret Weapon
(Can’t see the image? Click here to download Romans 8:37)
When I first tried the Complaint-Free challenge six years ago, I had minimal success with strictly behavioral approaches.
When I started to complain, I’d tell myself, “No. Stop that!”
Sometimes, I’d get so frustrated with myself, I’d scold myself, “Cheri, stop that negativity right now!”
I came out ahead in a few small battles. But that was all.
Last year, when I started turning to God’s Word to replace my words of complaint, criticism, gossip, and sarcasm, the war took a turn.
An obvious turn. Astonishing turn. Miraculous turn.
It clearly had nothing to do with me. And everything to do with the power of God’s word.
Now I say, “Jesus, I choose to trust you when you say…” prior to reciting or reading scripture. For me, it’s powerful to interrupt a complaint with the name of Jesus–the Word made flesh–followed by the Word.
Victory in Christ
But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
1 Corinthians 15:57
Try this today
Listen to or read the lyrics to Petra’s “The Battle Belongs to the Lord” and Don Francisco’s “Jehoshaphat”.
Leave a comment
- responding to today’s blog, and/or
- sharing your Day #1-8 experience of replacing “baditude” with God’s word and gratitude, and/or
- about anything else on your heart!
I try not to be negative. The more people that I encounter day to day that are negative. the more I try to find something good to say.
The battle belongs to Him and we need to know who the enemy is. I love it!
Thank you for sharing today’s post. I hear what you’re saying about the students/parents complaining about “me.” When in reality it is that they waited until the last minute to prepare. I tend to take on the burdens of many and feel as though I need to fix it ALL! Whew!
I am currently in a situation where letting this happened has affected my health. I am leaving for an MRI as soon as I finish this comment. Thank you for letting God use you as His vessel! Amen!
I have been carrying the cards in my purse…I am going to carry them in my pocket at work and whip them out …because I really need his word to get me through the day …
Thank you for reminding of one of the tools I can use to WIN…..Tomorrow will be a great day!!!
I have also tried the 21 day challenge! I found the same frustration you did- I wasn’t replacing my complaints with the right stuff! Thanks for sharing!
I’ve been reading your posts every day. I can relate to all of it. I have the bracelet and am really praying God delivers me from all this griping. Thank you so much for taking the time to do this challenge. I’ll definitely be sticking with you all month!
That is such a great strategy. I need to memorize all these verses so I can say them against the enemy!
Wow…I love this!! Amen
Such an amazing Truth. We have one true enemy and we don’t have to fight him, God is doing it for us, we just have to allow him to do it!! I am really enjoying these daily encourageing messages, thank you so much Cheri!!
Awesome post! A song just keeps going through my head today over and over from Hillsong called “Forever Reign”:
Oh, I’m running to Your arms,
I’m running to Your arms
The riches of Your love
Will always be enough
Nothing compares to Your embrace
Light of the world forever reign
It’s what I need to do when the enemy starts in on me!
I have battled with negativity for so long. I am a do it right, do it right NOW, and don’t take your time about it kind of person. The problem is that, with three children (6, 3, and 9I months) and two dogs, life just is NOT that way!!! Things get left undone while other things are tended to. My house is no longer perfect, in fact, most days, it is messy! This drives me crazy, makes me depressed, causes me to dwell on myself and my feelings, and makes my negative side shine… I know that if I kept my house clean ALL THE TIME, it would improve my mood, but since life is busy and children are busier :-), I have to find a different way to take charge of my words and my attitude. That is why I took this challenge. I know I have a problem and that I need help. The SCRIPTURE memory is a big help, and GOD brings these to mind when my mouth starts to open. Thank you! I am praying for alot of growth in this area. I know my children and husband will be happy for the change ;-).
I tend to think of Satan as a fictional character (you know the one you always see on T.V. and in movies), I often forget how real he is and that he is the REAL ENEMY. Thanks for reminding me who I am fighting against.
I have lived much of my life “as if” it were a battlefield with so many obstacles and enemies to overcome in order to “win.” In many ways, the strategy has served me well and helped me reach some very practical goals. The problem has come (EVERY time!) when I try to be the General instead of the foot soldier that Christ expects me to be. I’m NOT designed to be the general, but need constant reminders to keep me from trying! The victories truly are “through Christ who loved us,” and loves us still.
This message really spoke to me. I constantly find myself having made up arguments with my husband in my head and thinking how I am no good for him. How exhausting!! This reminded me how much more powerful God’s word truly is.
Natalie
Oops—forgot to sign my name. Anonymous above is Donna Marie.
I have found that going to God’s Word is the best way to maintain an attitude of gratitude. For me, the negativity problem is most often expressed in worry, so I lean heavily on the Psalms and on God’s promises to keep me focused upward and outward.
I love this and really needed this today. Lately I have felt like the battle is taking over and winning, BUT I know I have VICTORY in JESUS!!
Thank you!
Mandy Cumbass
I love this – going to the word of God is so powerful & can help us change so much! We can’t better ourselves or kick bad behavior on our own. I’m so thankful God is here to help! 🙂
Hallelujah He will fight the battle for us. The words to both of those songs were just what I needed today. What an encouragement. Sarah
Mmm Mmmm – We have this thing that we say (our Associate Pastor and a group of us) when some good preachin’s bein’ done…… “COME ON NOW”!! Thank you for sharing that, especially the last part about not trying to do this on our own will!
God bless!
Hallelujah!!! That really spoke to my heart! Amen!
Yes, yes and AMEN! Every word you said is so true! Thank you for shining God’s light brightly…He is at work through you!
Blessings,
Susan