Day 21: HOLD

Ever find yourself in the the middle of an argument, wondering

• How did I get here?

• How can I get out?

As the dust settles, you try to re-play the whole thing start-to-finish and discover huge gaps in your memory…

…like what started it?

Half of what you said?

For several days, now, I’ve been trying to triage what I will prudently refer to as “the sorbet incident.”

Problem is, I have no idea what Daniel said that set me off.

• I do know I got defensive.

• I do know I “explained” my reasons for doing what I did.

But I do not know why I made such a big deal out of it. The whole thing could have been handled in 3-4 sentences, sans emotion.

I want to say it started when Daniel said something about the sorbet.

Truth is, it started when I reacted to whatever Daniel said about the sorbet.

When I failed to “hold my tongue.”

When I failed to practice what I preached one short week ago when I wrote, “a priceless gift can be mine for the cost of silence: trust.”

Hold One at a Time

When our first dog was a puppy, she loved carrying things around in her mouth. We’d take her on walks, and she’d pounce on the first stick she saw, get it in her mouth, and proudly walk along holding it high.

But soon, she’d spy a different stick. One short moral quandary later, she’d drop the first stick and pick up the new one.

Then she’d see a pine cone. Same process. We joked that she was moving the entire world forward ten paces at a time!

Since she could only fit one thing in her mouth at a time, she faced forced alternatives: this stick or that pinecone?

I face the same choice.

Every time I open my mouth.

What will it be: my words or God’s words?

Either / or.

(I long for the day when it’s not a forced alternative. When I am so fluent in God that my words are His words!)

Hold His Words

(Can’t see image? Click here to download Proverbs 10:19!)

Yes, it’s important to learn to “hold my tongue.”

But I know from experience that if that’s all I do–exercise self-control in my own strength–I will end up with inflated self-confidence and pride.

Far more important is for me to hold God’s Word in my heart so that I have ready replacements when my own words aren’t worth saying!

I’ve been pairing replacement Bible verses to my thoughtless “pet phrases” of complaining+:

For example, I want…

• “Why on earth…” to trigger Romans 8:37: “No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours though Christ, who loved us.”

• “How could I have…” to trigger Ephesians 2:10: “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.”

• “I can not believe that (s)he…” to trigger Luke 6:27-28: “Love your enemies, do good tot hose who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.”

Your “pet phrases” are no doubt different from mine. But the whole point of The PURSE-onality Challenge is to actively replace that “baditude” with God’s word.

Hold Me

One reason “the sorbet incident” disturbs me is that I can’t remember what “pet phrases” I used.

Probably several old favorites that are eluding capture, and I want to “take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:5)

But when “the sorbet incident” started, what I wanted even more was to (a) be right and (b) revive an old grudge.

I was deaf to God’s word…even to remembering my own words!

This is disheartening.

Yes, partly because I am facilitating The PURSE-onality Challenge and would love to share nothing but success after success after success!

But mostly because I’m so tired of living in the aftermath of not holding my tongue and not holding God’s word.

• Tired of not remembering what I said, but knowing it was all wrong.

• Tired of feeling like all I am is one big “sorbet incident.”

• Tired of feeling like nothing ever really changes.

Better late than never, I remember God’s words: “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

• Yes, I am learning to hold my tongue.

• Yes, I am learning to hold God’s word in my heart.

Right now, I just need Him to hold me.

 

Try this today:  

(1) Start a list of your “pet phrases” and begin pairing them with replacement Bible verses;

(2) Listen to or read the lyrics to “Hold Me Jesus” as a reminder that the only lasting change comes because He holds you.

 

Leave a comment!

• responding to today’s blog, and/or

• sharing your Day #1-21 experience of replacing “baditude” with God’s word and gratitude, and/or

• about anything else on your heart!

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